OMG you guys my Moms is so EMBARRASSING. Like, look at her! All cuddly and smothering with her eyes all closed and I THINK SHE IS INHALING MY EAR SMELLS. Doesn’t she know that I’m an ADULT now! JEEZ LOUISE, MOM!
Like, it’s okay when my one true love Miss Timothy Buttons inhales my ear smells. In fact, I wish she’d do it more often. I inhale Timothy’s ear smells ALL THE TIME but when I ask T-Buttz to inhale my ear smells she’s always like “I’M A BUSY LADY, SIDDHARTHA” and then she goes and chases after her stupid laser pointer or something and when I REMIND her that the laser pointer ain’t gonna tuck her in at night she’s all like “I’M A 21ST CENTURY WOMAN! I CAN TUCK MYSELF IN!” and before I can say anything back she runs into the other room and burrows under a blanket so I just take a deep breath and let her have her space but then, like, fifteen minutes later, after I’ve moved on and started chewin’ on my antler, I suddenly feel her absurdly long tongue floppin’ against the side of my head and and her pretty, pretty muzzle pressed right up against my ear and then I hear her nose take a deep breath…and when she’s done inhaling my ear smells I say, “Timothy Buttons, you complete me.”
“A Timothy Buttons by any other name would smell as sweet.”