NOT Awesome

Okay, so, I was layin’ in my snuggle bed this morning, and while I was layin’ there I was thinking that it’s been, like, what, A WEEK since my awesome Mr. Chewy box arrived? And there hasn’t been a single box since.  Unacceptable!

And, then, just like THAT, Planet Cool Sid’s buzzer buzzed and a delivery man was handing my mom a NEW BOX.

Okay, this box was not as gigantic as the Mr. Chewy box, so that was a little disappointing.

BUT.

Right on the outside of this box, there were some words that said MAY CONTAIN AWESOME and then some other words that said NEWEGG.

Okay, here’s what I know about New Eggs: supposedly they’re delicious but I’m not allowed to eat them because they’re somehow related to the chickens and I’m allergic to the chickens.  BUT!  Ducks also lay eggs and I am allowed to eat ducks so maybe I could eat some eggs if they were duck eggs.  And since these eggs are new, that means they’re not old, which means they’re better than old eggs because they’re not rotten or whatever.

And here’s what I know about Awesome: IT’S AWESOME.

So, I was all like “Mom! Open the box! Open the box, Mom! MAHM! OPEN THE BOX!”

And Mom was all like, “As you wish, Master. Let me feed you a bag of treats first.”

So, Mom opened the box.

AND GET THIS.

Apparently NewEgg is the name of some company that has NOTHING TO DO with actual eggs.  They sell electronics, for pug’s sake!  And apparently AWESOME to this NewEgg place means 1TB hard drives for my Mom’s photo library.

MAY CONTAIN AWFUL is more like it.

Yes, they’re one terabyte, yet THEY’RE NOT EVEN REMOTELY BITE-ABLE.  Trust me, I tried.

Stupid homonyms.

Mom says she had to order these because all the photos she takes of me are taking over the hard drive on her computer, so in a way they’re a gift to me because it means she can continue to take more and more and more photos of me forever and ever and ever because apparently a terabyte is a really, really, really big byte that you can’t actually chew.  I guess that’s good, because I like when you guys can see my handsomeness, but that doesn’t mean I’m not incredibly disappointed by all of this misleading terminology.

Get these things away from me.

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7 Responses to “NOT Awesome”

  1. avatar Minnie Moo Says:

    So not cool. I hate it when packages are not for me. And I’m really loving that your pad is so awesome and your mom like does whatever you want. You gotta teach me that trick pronto!

    Muah,

    Minnie Moo

  2. avatar Meredith & Scarlet Says:

    A byte that you can’t bite? If it weren’t for the fact that these suspect bytes are to keep us seeing you, we’d say they were useless.

    XOXOXO
    Meredith & Scarler

  3. avatar Urban Hounds Says:

    Oh poor Sid what a let down. Tell mom to open another bag of treats pronto

    urban hounds

  4. avatar Noodles Says:

    Sid
    Your disappointment is written all over your face. Was your human misleading you for a giggle?
    Unacceptable.
    Love Noodles

  5. avatar Boo & Human Says:

    Sid and Humans,

    We found your site via The Daily Puglet and we’re LOOOOOOOOOOOOVIN’ you guys! Keep them coming, and Sid, you’ll definitely get a box of goodies soon. Humans have to make it up to you after teasing with you “bytes” and all.

    Cheers Mate,
    Boo & Human

  6. avatar Mochi Says:

    Sid did you sign up for 1000 Pug?

    Mochi

  7. avatar Southern Fried Pugs Says:

    Yes, did you sign up? We did! We are going Saturday to New Jersey!

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